Usually I have no-nonsense get it done approach when something is important to me or my family. I go full on attack mode. But these past few weeks I had been dreading the completion of my daughter’s home school portfolio. Sure, I’d taken plenty of notes throughout the year and had gathered all of her assignments and curriculum. I even had photos of all the fun learning activities we’d done stored in a file ready to be printed, but for some reason I didn’t feel like completing the portfolio. Day in and day out it just sat there in a pile near my desk waiting to be completed. And day in and day out I’d walk by, sigh and roll my eyes at it while mumbling “I really need to finish that portfolio.”.
Last night I finally mustered up the discipline to start typing away on her reading log, list of sight words etc. Then, as I reviewed her writing, her funny sense of humor started jumping off the pages. Her love for science, space and robots became clear to me in her selection of books for independent reading. I realized how much progress she’d made over the course of the school year. I ‘m not going to lie; I was one proud mama. I was also a humbled mama.
You see, all year long we worked really hard together. Some days were so much fun and other days well…they were exhausting. For both of us! On the not so great days it felt like she was never going to understand this or that. And now as I look back I see how much progress had been made. She was learning and retaining way more than I ever perceived at the time.
This is very much like my walk with God. Most of the time it feels like another day goes by and nothing changes. It seems like God is not working and I’m not doing enough either. Yet when I step back and take a good look at the bigger picture I can see God in the details. I realize “Oh my God you’ve been with me all along. Strengthening me through this or carrying me through that.” All along he’s been teaching me, the child he loves.
Like a wise father and patient teacher God is teaching me to live one day at a time. He’s teaching me that perfection is not real. That cynicism can ruin genuine meaningful relationships. He’s teaching me that vulnerability is not a weakness and that being yourself is the best gift you can give to yourself and others.
I encourage you to do the same. Take a step back and take a good look at the details. You’ll see that God is with you too.
Progress is being made. Changes are taking place. Thank you Lord Jesus.
I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go;Psalm 32:8
I will counsel you with my eye upon you.